Sweet Valentines Surprise

I've been subbing a few times every week and I've enjoyed it. It's good for me to get out and do something and it's always nice to put more money towards chipping away at our debt. When I subbed on Thursday last week for a teacher at Hartman I glanced at her bulletin board where she has pictures of her family and saw the sweetest little valentines looking at me. It melted my heart to see you on her board next to your sister Audrey. 

What a beautiful baby and first grader!!! Sure love my babies. 

This weekend has been a tough one. I've been having dreams the past few nights that are very difficult. Dreams of problems with this pregnancy. Being taken to the hospital in an ambulance and seeing your sisters crying faces as I have to leave. Not knowing how this pregnancy will end as I cry in the hospital. I know they are just dreams but they are hard to shake. I am still learning how to put my trust in Heavenly Fathers plan for each of his children even despite all we have already gone through. As I was eating before church today I was overcome with emotion as I thought about the possibility of Alexis being born too early and it was hard to control my crying. I thought, "I can't go through that again. I couldn't do it." And then a few moments later I thought, "Yes, somehow I would." Although I know that Heavebly Fathers ways are higher than my ways and that he knows all its still tricky. Im trying my very best and putting one foot in front of the other each day. Ultimately I know he knows what is best for His children and as hard as trials are, I trust him. It doesn't mean it's easy but it is most definitely worth it. One day at a time...

I love you, baby boy. More than you'll ever know. 

All my love,

Mom