One Year

The morning of July 8th the girls came into our bedroom with breakfast in bed. Your sweet sisters spent a long time making dad and me a special breakfast. The best part was the super Caleb symbol they made out of strawberries. They used super hero cups and gave us super hero bracelets from your first birthday party. It was such a tender and sweet gesture and one I will always remember. 

Your sisters are so thoughtful and wonderful. 

Getting ready to go to the NICU

 Someone was very sleep and cuddled your lovey.

 We stopped at your grave before going to the NICU

 We went to the store and everyone picked out a flower for you that we put in a bouquet.

We will bring you the bouquet each year.

 Walking into the hospital. 

 The girls were so excited. We all were.

 Even Lexie was. :)

 We seriously love the staff at Dallas Presby. Beyond amazing.

 Nursery C was where you started and then about half way through the NICU stay you moved to Nursery G. I miss calling every night and every morning to check on you. I miss saying your medical record number and hearing the update. I miss seeing you. I miss holding you. I miss your chubby cheeks. Your darling dimples. Your rubber band wrists and huge cheeks. I miss your dark hair and beautiful eyes. I miss your smile. Oh how I miss every single thing about you.

 It was so neat to take the loveys around to all the babies. The girls were over the moon that they got to go around to give them away this time. 

In the winter kids aren't allowed in the NICU so they were so happy to come in.

 Super Sissies.

 Dr. Green and Dr. Nystrom gave your sisters a treat like old times and let them eat it in the Doctor's lounge. They loved it.

One of my favorite things about that day was that Lexie laughed for the very first time for Daddy while we were visiting the NICU. That memory will be one I cherish always. A little piece of heaven right there. I love going to the NICU to honor you. You are one loved little boy. 

So many people called, texted, sent flowers, gifts, visited your grave, sent you balloons, and so many other thoughtful things. I will be forever grateful to those that mourned with me and sent comfort in different forms that day. One thing I was not prepared for on the anniversary of your passing was how traumatic it would be. I relived the moments and went over everything in my mind. One of the hardest days of my life. I never knew how hard that day was for those that have lost someone or how hard it would and will be for me. There is no way around the pain of losing you on July 8th.  You are one special boy, Caleb Luke. My sweet son. I love you to heaven and back.

xoxo

Mom